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Suzanne Westenhoefer was born March 31, 1961 in Columbia, Pennsylvania, the youngest of three sisters. When the girls where between the age from six to two, their father abandoned them and their mother. Their situation was highly unusual for the time and place; Westenhoefer recalled that "there were no other divorced families in the entire town" back in the 1960s. From that experience she and her sister and mother became "very, very bonded" to each other.
The youngest of three sisters, Westenhoefer was born March 31, 1961 in Lancaster County, Pennsylvania. When the girls ranged in age from six to two, their father abandoned them and their mother. Their situation was highly unusual for the time and place; Westenhoefer recalled that "there were no other divorced families in the entire town" back in the 1960s. Perhaps partly because of that, the mother and her daughters are all "very, very bonded" to each other.
Her middle sister Joan,is also a lesbian activist and their mother is proud of both her girls who are out and proud. Upon meeting other parents of GLBT children, her mother has been has been known to quip, "You have only one?"
Westenhoefer's oldest sister, a born-again Pentecostal, thinks they will be damned for their sins, but nevertheless, everyone manages to get along. "We love each other, and we're never not going to be friends," said Westenhoefer of her family.
After high school, she went to Clarion University. While there, she helped found the college's first gay and lesbian group.
After earning her degree in drama, she moved to New York City in hopes of beginning an acting career. She continued her involvement in GLBT causes, marching with ACT UP and later with Queer Nation after that group split off from ACT UP.
Out, proud, pretty, and funny, she found success as a stand-up comedian and actress.
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She got wider attention when she appeared on a January 1991 episode of the Sally Jesse Raphael's show entitled "Lesbians Who Don't Look Like Lesbians." The tall, blond, and beautiful Westenhoefer evidently did not match whatever stereotypical image the producers had of what lesbians looked like.
She didn't perform on the show, but just the fact that she was identified as a stand-up comedian led to more bookings and opportunities to tour.
She was an immediate hit with queer audiences, but she wanted to reach out to the mainstream public. "I want to talk to straight people. I want to dialogue with them. I want them to get over this stereotype stuff. I have a desperate need to convince each straight person that we're fine," she said, adding that from the beginning, "I've always enjoyed the responsibility of being, to some degree, a vocal person for the gay community. I take that on on purpose. It's a mission in my life."
She made her television debut when she was featured in "Out There", a special filmed on National Coming Out Day, October 11, 1993. The next year she was the first openly gay comic to host her own HBO Comedy Special in 1994 which earned her a Cable Ace Award.
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Her second CD, I'm Not Cindy Brady,refers to the fact that some people thinking she played the youngest daughter on the sitcom The Brady Bunch. The album garnered another GLAMA Award.
While she was racking up time and praise for her TV appearances on cable, including stand-up performances on Comedy Central, Evening at the Improv, Caroline's Comedy Hour, Politically Incorrect with Bill Maher, and The Jon Stewart Show, the networks were slow to recognize her.
Her first appearance on network TV came in March 2003 when she was a guest on the David Letterman Show. It was a first for Letterman as well: no out lesbian comic had been invited before, nor had any openly gay man.
Letterman's booker had been trying for two years to convince executives to invite her on the show, and when the call finally came, she saw it as both an opportunity and a responsibility. "I felt the need to do really well because I was speaking--and hopefully opening doors--for lots of gay folks," she stated. "I was also scared because I am female. Watch TV; not too many chicks [are] getting the opportunity to do stand-up either."
Westenhoefer has noted there is a bizarre parallel between the boosts to her career by her appearances on Raphael and Letterman: the former occurred the day before the start of the Gulf War, and the latter took place on the eve of the war with Iraq. "Two big milestones of my career, and a Bush goes into Iraq and attacks. There's something creepy about it."
She is also one of four lesbian comedians including Kate Clinton, Marga Gómez, and Karen Williams who were profiled in Andrea Meyerson's 2004 film Laughing Matters. The documentary included interviews with the women as well as segments from their stage shows.
In 2006, she returned to cable television as a panelist on the Game Show Network's revival of I've Got a Secret, a long-running show of the 1950s and 1960s. Joining her on the all-gay panel of the new edition were radio host Frank DeCaro, actor and dancer Jermaine Taylor, and former major-league baseball player Billy Bean.
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She continues to tour and her latest venture is a starring role in the popular online web drama “We Have To Stop Now” is about to enter its second season, with the first soon available on DVD from Wolfe Video.
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Westenhoefer has always been a supporter of women's and GLBT rights. She is a strong supporter of Planned Parenthood, after getting pregnant as a teenager, and having the option of choice, allowing her to choose to terminate the pregnancy.
She is strongly committed to the GLBT community and works many benefit appearances into her busy schedule of around one hundred concerts per year. She also encourages other performers to do their part as well: "Host AIDS fundraisers, and breast cancer auctions, and drag queen contests, and drag king contests."
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One cause that is especially important is Marriage Equality.
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They were married in California, September 9, 2008. They chose to set their wedding date before the November election, in which Proposition 8 would be on the ballot in California.
Because they were married before the election, their union is among the approximately 18,000 same-sex marriages legally recognized by the state.
The couple maintains homes in Columbus, Ohio, and Los Angeles, California.